On arrival we were greeted by a lady in latex with a whip (the owner, nonetheless) and it didn't take long afterwards to discover that our reservation did not exist, despite only being confirmed two days before.
The restaurant was empty, and the chef not in attendance, but it was ok, apparently, as he only lives nearby. Ten minutes later and we are informed that the chef was in his underpants getting changed, great. The excitement of the chef's arrival didn't transpire into the meal, which wasn't great. Two sets of onion rings were left raw and the accompanying sauce for one dish didn't arrive until half of it had been eaten. Nothing else warrants a comment.
Whilst trying to settle our nerves with a pre-dinner drink, a member of our party almost put their hand on the bar next to what we thought was an ornamental, foot long lizard. It was actually a real lizard, which is clearly allowed to roam free.
What more can I say, other than we won't be visiting again. The town is crying out for a decent hotel, but this isn't it.